Sunday, July 8, 2007


The more I read, the more of these I notice. We have the Thinking Blogger Award – a nice way to honor blogs that expose you to new ideas, to expose your readers to four other places you enjoy, and a way for others to have more links added on the giant web. I’ve also seen the “8 things about you” one flying around, the ‘Interview’ where you can ask five questions of someone else, and now I just got the Rocking Girl award.

All of these are great for their purposes – they expose people to new facets of the blogger they’re reading, they publicize other bloggers, they are of interest to the reader, and many reasons I’m probably forgetting.

So of course, now I want to start one. Confession is good for the soul, so let’s call this Three Apologies. I figure, since the whole thing I’m trying to get over is that everything I do is wrong, it fits. The rules are simple – make three apologies that are long overdue, something that’s been gnawing at you for a long time. Send it to the universe. You can be as specific or vague as you like, but clear your soul.

All the other memes require tagging people, kind of forcing them to post such things. I’m not that kind of person. But if you like the idea when you make a post just put a little note that the meme, this ‘Three Apologies’ Meme, started here. Unless of course, it didn't. Who knows, it's probably out there somewhere too. But this version is from me.

Image, such as it is, copyright vchase2007

Apology One: Donna – I’m so sorry about what happened at Camp. I know the rest of the crew descended like feral beasts on your dreams. I think we were just all so dead, maybe it was normal teenage cruelty against someone who thinks they can rise above life, I don’t know. But we had no right to run your panties up the flag pole. Or worse, the whole raiding of the cabin? I was involved with everyone on the kitchen staff. We all decided to raid our own cabin just so we could ruin your ‘superstar’ outfit. We tossed it into Lake Seneca. It was the captain’s son, I forget his name now, that peed in your perfume bottles. What hurt me the worst was that I was the one you turned too for a shoulder to cry on. You felt I was the nicest of the bunch, I was just the most confused I think. I wanted to be able to help people, but at the same time wanted to see if hurting others gave the rush it seemed to give everyone else. It didn’t. This has stuck with me for a long time. I’m truly sorry for my part in those actions.

Apology Two: G – In high school I never knew whether to hate or like you. You were intelligent and from a good family, but such an easy target for teenage angst. You had an attitude and feelings of entitlement that bothered a lot of our class. I tried to be nice to you, and compared to the others in school I suppose I was. I think in the end, in our senior year, I did like you but by then felt like I was shut out of your social group even though intellectually I was in every one of your classes. There was a point, maybe freshman year when we used to get along. Remember? We traded books – I ended up with your one dragon book all summer because I was too sick to attend the last three weeks of school. Well I had a crush on you that summer. My mother found out. She told me we were related. She said that she had found her cousin and he was related to your father. I tried to get that out of my mindset, but once it was planted that seed grew. Now I saw your faults in relation to my family and was saddened by what I felt was the inevitable. I wish I had just told you how I thought I could feel instead of letting my mother find out. Who knows how school could have turned out for us two geeks if we had joined forces instead of fought off and on?

Three is a hard one. Those are the main things that kind of hang over my head today, actions I wish I could have taken back or, at the very least, apologized to in person. I don’t know- guilt really sucks.

Apology Three: I remember this, and it’s from oh so long ago. We were just little kids, five years old running around Orange Street in the good ol’ AZ. I don’t even remember your name, but I remember Trin – my best friend at the time. I don’t know what overcame us, we were all latch key kids. But your keys? We threw them down the sewer drain and ran like holy hell. I have no idea why, but sometimes I still see Trin and I running away with your keys and then throwing them down the grate. Just flashes as I fall to sleep.

memewarning from through google pictures.


Michelle said...

Great idea, but I'm wondering if anyone is brave enough to take on this one! I'm thinking about it.. no promises! lol

I once phoned a friend and got him to come over to say sorry (a joke that had backfired type thing) ..only he didn't realise why I was asking him over and came around with three other friends!
Yes, I did say sorry in front of all of them. It was kind of humiliating, kind of funny.

Amel's Realm said...

Nice idea of a meme, Vic!!!

Guilty really sucks indeed. But yeah, you need to let it go, too by way of this meme. Let it go to the universe...and continue living with lighter steps. :-)))

Sometimes I think forgiving oneself is harder than forgiving others, don't you think so?

Wish you an ENLIGHTENING Monday!!! ;-D

Victorya said...

Michelle - I don't really expect many people too, which is why I didn't want to make it mandatory. It's really hard to face yourself sometimes.

Amel - yeah, Learning to forgive yourself is really hard. We're all human and thus imperfect beings and make mistakes. As long as we learn and move on we're on the right path.